Snowstory
by Dark.Priestress
Summary: A little glimpse into Severus' past with Lily Potter and his future with Bellatrix. AU, after the battle. Bellatrix and Severus started a life together but he has a little something in his past he didn't tell Bellatrix about...


Hey guys, this is a little thing I have been working on for quite some time now. I know it's not Christmas time now but I just wanted to publish this at last. I hope you like it anyway. Reviews are always appreciated because I would really love to know what you think of this.

Have fun and thanks for reading so far ^^

Disclaimer: Not mine… none of them. Just borrowed the characters for some fun time ;)

**Snowstory**

Snow fell thick and covered the world with a nice, white blanket.

Severus Snape watched the huge crystals falling into his garden from inside of his little house.

He sighed. Behind him, a woman turned in their bed and mumbled sleepy. He looked at her as she opened her eyes. "Go back to sleep", he said and put his hand lovingly on her head. He smiled at the mass of curls that spread uncontrolled over the pillows.

"Where are you going?", she asked and tried to sit up. With light pressure he pushed her back into the sheets and pulled the blanket over her body. "Don't worry. I'll be back soon.", Severus said and placed a soft kiss onto her forehead. She smiled.

Severus walked out of the bedroom into the bathroom and quickly dressed himself. Before he left, he peeked into the bedroom and took one final glance at his beloved.

He then went down the stairs of their house, out of the front door and through the garden gate.

After stepping out of the gate, where all the protection- and Anti- Apparition- Spells lost their power, he desapparated with a soft _plopp._

After Bellatrix heard the front door close behind her beloved, she quickly got out of her bed and dressed herself. The silent _plopp _of Severus'Disapparition was her sign to go. She, too, left the house and went through the garden gate.

Standing on the exact spot as Severus had done only a few moments before, she cast a spell to pick up his magical tracks. She also vanished with a silent _plopp._

They had been together for three years now. The war was over and neither of them had felt the urge to go back to the wizarding world. So they bought a nice little cottage by the sea and led a quiet but decent life ever since.

But every year, when the first snow fell from the winter skies, Severus Snape had taken off for an hour by himself, never telling Bellatrix where he went nor what he did there.

At first, Bellatrix hadn't given it too much thought but lately she suspected him of keeping secrets from her. When she asked him what he was doing on his own every year, he didn't give an answer or just said it was nothing for her to worry about.

But she did worry, for the snow came early this year. It was almost Christmas, which brought back all the bad and painful memories of Bellatrix's unhappy marriage to Rudolphus. Him cheating on her and abusing her and with that came a feeling that Snape had something unthinkable going on.

So this year, she would follow him. This year, Bellatrix would find out what Severus Snape's secret was. This time, she wouldn't be fooled by a man.

With the help of the tracking spell, Bellatrix followed Severus to a little village. She looked around and spotted him on a playground. She approached him slowly.

Severus kneeled in front of a small bench at the back of the playground. His head was bent down and he murmured something Bellatrix wasn't quite able to hear.

"Well, here I am again", Severus said, "the day of the first snow. The day we met for the first time."

* * *

It was snowing heavily. Little Severus peaked out of his bedroom window. He liked the snow but did not have a real relation to it. His parents hated it so he was never allowed to go out to actually play in it. 'Would be too much fun' he guessed but he himself never felt the urge to go out into the cold, either.

But this year, he had to admit, was different, as he watched the snow- covered playground diagonally oposite of his house.

He saw a little red- haired girl running down the street towards the playground. Her green jacked matched the color of her shining, ginger hair marvellously.

She turned around and waved at the direction she came from. Severus looked further to his right and noticed another, taller girl walking slowly towards the little one.

She had brown, rather short hair clutching on her head. She looked grumpy and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

The little red- head ran to the snow- covered swing, shoved the snow off the seat, hopped onto it and started to swing.

She soon gained height and laughed and giggled in joy.

Severus felt the edges of his mouth rise lightly and suddenly had the desire to join the girl in her joy.

But his fluttering heart and desire were pulled back into reality hartly at the harsh sound of his father's voice calling for him.

"Coming!", Severus called out. Annoyed, he ripped his gaze off the beautiful sight of the charming red- head, crossed his room and stomped down the stairs of the house to meet his father in the kitchen.

Entering, he was a bit confused of the scenery that awaited him there.

At his father's call he thought that he would probably be punished again of something that he didn't do. As usual...

But his parents stood there in the kitchen, covered in their travelling- cloaks, ready to leave.

"We're visiting the Malfoys. You'll stay here.", his father simply stated. Severus had never seen his parents so tense... or was it excitement? "Come on now, or we will be late!", his mother said from behind. His father gave him another strict glance and joined his wife at the fireplace.

One after the other stepped into the fireplace, shouted 'Malfoy Manor' and disappeared in emerald- green flames. Severuns stood there a little stunned and totally alone in the kitchen of his house.

After a while, he realised what had happened: he was ALONE in his for some insane, unexplainable reason his father had forgotten to cast the locking spells over the doors and windows. He never had before. Normally, his father locked him in the dark and cold house to ensure that he didn't step outside to explore the Muggle- Village they were living in but today he just didn't. Something very extreme must have happened for his father to forget to imprison his son.

Severus didn't care what could have happened, he just felt like the luckiest person in the world. For the first time of his life, he was free to do whatever he wanted to.

But what would he do? Jump up and down on his bed? No... he never was the type of boy to do so... maybe read in one of the ancient books from his father's library?

Yes! That would be great!

He moved to his right towards a big wooden door that went to his father's library, full of old, valuable books he was never even allowed to come near to but he stopped instantly as he heared an unfamiliar sound. The joyous giggle of a little girl. Suddenly, he knew exactly what he wanted to do...

"Come on, let's go home now!", Petunia said to her little sister Lily. But the little red- head didn't want to leave yet. She loved the snow... oposite to her older sister who just hated it. She was much more fond of lying around at home watching TV and doing nothing. But Lily didn't. She was always on the move, trying out new games and ideas, talking to imaginary friends or helping her mother taking care of her beloved flowers.

"No, not yet! Please, I want to stay a little longer!", Lily pleaded. "Listen", Petunia was starting to get pissed "I am cold and I am bored, so I'm going home. Do whatever you want!" She turned around and stomped away. Actually, she was not allowed to leave her sister alone but she didn't care. Thier parents weren't at home anyway and they wouldn't be back for hours. If Lily wouldn't be back in an hour or so, Petunia could fetch her then still.

Lily couldn't believe sister was leaving her alone. She just walked away. For a moment, Lily thought of following her but decided not to. For the first time in her life she was free to do whatever she wanted to. And she just wanted to stay in the nice, cold and white snow.

Severus peeked around the corner of his house. He just watched the older girl leave. Now the younger was alone, too. She looked puzzeled for a moment and Severus almoust thought that she would leave, too, but she didn't. Instead, she started swinging again. And she smiled. A smile so wunderful Severus had never seen before.

He crossed the street slowly, never really taking his eyes off her.

Lost in her swinging, little Lily Evans didn't notice the weird boy coming towards her until he stood right next to the swings.

Naturally, she was a shy person, never really approaching people, but this boy seemed to be just as insecure as herself, standing next to the empty swing.

Lily stopped her swinging and looked at the boy. "Hello", she said smiling and hopped off the seat. The boy only stared at her.

They stood like that for several moments and Lily started to feel awkward so she turned away. The boy scared her a bit, just standing there in his black clothes with the coal greasy hair and the pale skin, staring at her.

Severus sensed her unease and was scared she would leave so he took a step forward.

The warm smile fell from the girl's face and she looked startled. "Please, don't be scared", Severus said quick, "I didn't mean to scare you...", he added shyly.

"It's all right. I was just... never mind. I'm Lily. What's your name?" "My name is Severus", he answered "Severus?", Lily smiled, "That's a funny name" "You think so?", Severus asked, not really knowing whether he should be flattered or offended.

As if she had sensed his inner revel, Lily added "I meant.. I like the name. It's just... uncanny" "Well, thank you", he answered politely.

So they stood there again in slightly awkward silence and looked at one another.

'He looks sweet', Lily thought, '...funny and weird but cute... somehow...' She smiled at him again.

'The world seems to be a nicer place when she smiles', Severus thought and the corners of his mouth curled slightly upwards.

"You look nice when you smile", Lily said. Severus looked down, his cheeks turning red.

Another moment of awkward silence followed.

"Would... you... like to swing?", the girl asked. Severus looked up again into her green eyes. "I", he paused, "I don't really know how to... swing", his gaze fell again in embarrassment.

"You mean you've never played on a swing before?", Lily asked stunned "No", Severus simply and honestly replied.

"But it's so very much fun! You have to try it. Come here!" Lily stepped behind the swing. "You sit down here", she pointed at the seat. Severus sat down and held onto the chains. "Hold on tight", the red- head advised before giving Severus a push.

The swing moved and he felt a tickle in his stomach followed by a great wave of joy spreading itself through his body.

He started laughing in a way he never had before.

"Do you like it?", Lily asked already knowing the answer. "I love it!", Severus screeched. "Good" Then try this!", Lily said before pushing Severus harder to make the swing move faster and his laughter even louder.

After a while they were both worn out from joy and laughter and sat down on a nearby bench. Still smiling, Lily held her hand out "It's starting to snow again", she said and looked upwards into the cloudy sky.

And she was right. The snowfall came totally surprising and heavier than they would have thought, so both children soon were covered with the frozen ice- crystals.

"I love the snow", Lily stated absent- minded and looked at Severus. At his sight, the girls had to giggle. "What?", Severus asked puzzled. "You look so... funny!", the little red- head said. And he did, in fact. There he was, this young boy, covered with snow, his black hair and clothes a sharp contrast to his white surroundings. His hair clutched to his head, due to the wetness, and was dotted with bits of snow here and there. "Well, thanks", he simply said and started to move.

Lily, surprised by his reaction and afraid that she had said something wrong quickly added "No please don't leave. I didn't mean to be rude! I just...", she reached out and touched his arm.

Surprised himself, Severus halted his actions. She didn't want him to leave...?

He looked at her "I...I didn't want to go I just...", he took off his cloak, "I wanted you out of the snow before you get sick", he said, sat down right beside the little girl and held his cloak above both of their heads so the snow couldn't cover their bodies anymore.

"That's nice", Lily said and moved closer. The snowfall grew even heavier. "It looks nice, doesn't it?", she asked, "The snow always reminds me of my mother's orchids. She is very talented with flowers, you know. She grows orchids in with every kind of colour, but my favourite ones are the white ones. They look so beautiful!"

Severus smiled at her memories and a sudden idea came to his mind. He hesitated for a moment but then decided to give it a go. This little girl beside him was very special. "Can you hold that for a minute?", he asked and Lily took hold of one end of Severus' cloak, so he had one hand free. "Don't look", he said and turned his back on Lily. "What are you doing?", she asked curiously and tried to look over his shoulder. "Do not look!", Severus repeated, "I have a surprise for you". He felt Lily pull back slightly. He then reached into his pocket and took out his wand. He waved it and mumbled a few words so silently that Lily wasn't able to understand them.

As Severus turned himself back to face Lily, he had put his wand back into his pocket, so she couldn't see it. In his free hand he was now holding a small white orchid and presented it to Lily. "For you", he said.

Her eyes grew big in surprise as she saw the fragile little flower in the boy's hand.

"How did you do that?", she asked breathlessly.

The girl looked surprised indeed, but neither shocked nor scared and Severus decided not to lie to her and simply said "I'm a wizard".

"A... a wizard?", Lily asked bewildered, "Like the wizard of Oz?" "Who's that?", Severus asked. "Well, he's the ruler of the magical land of Oz but...", she looked at his puzzled face, "never mind. It's just a story from a book my mother gave me." Her cheeks turned slightly red and she gazed at the flower again.

Severus also looked at the flower for a while but quickly moved his gaze upward to Lily. He reached out and cautiously tucked the flower behind one of her ears. He smiled "looks beautiful" Lily's cheeks turned into a darker shade of red and she looked down at her feet. "Thanks", she said quietly.

They sat there, again, in silence, watching the snow fall peacefully from the sky.

But their quiet little paradise didn't last very long. The now comfortable silence was soon interrupted by a loud and demanding yell "LILY, COME HERE AT ONCE!"

Lily looked at Severus. "That's my sister", she said apologetically, "I'm sorry but I have to go" Severus sighed deeply "I see". He looked very sad.

To his surprise, the red- head leaned in and placed a sweet little kiss on his cheek. "Thank you for the wonderful day. I had a lovely time!", she said before leaving a stunned but happy little Severus Snape sitting on the bench in the snow.

* * *

Severus sighed and put a white orchid onto the bench. "I was so happy that day. I thought I would never be able to find such a peaceful moment in time again", he paused and smiled to himself. "But I have, Lily. Me and Bellatrix we are...", he stopped dead in his thought. A noise behind him had ripped him out of his thoughts.

Bellatrix had moved a bit closer to be able to hear what Severus was saying. She had intended to move quietly but due to the snow she wasn't able to see the piece of wood on the ground. The crack it made as she stepped onto it, ripped severely through the silence.

She stopped in the middle of the motion.

Severus turned around.

"WHAT", Severus instantly burst out, "are you doing here?". He was outraged and stomped towards her. Bellatrix, stunned by his outburst, was unable to move for a few moments. "I... I was", she stuttered. "You were what?", Severus shouted and rushed past her, "spying on me?", he turned towards her once more, "not trusting me?", he closed the gap between their two bodies with a huge step and glanced at her furiously. "Or merely following me?", he sneered, "old habits die hard, I guess", Bellatrix lifted her head and looked him straight in the eyes, half hurt, half furious herself by the insult.

Severus still was breathing heavily while both their bodies were trembling with anger, hate and shame. After a few moments of silence, Bellatrix found the courage to speak again "I just wanted to know...", but Severus didn't let her finish the line. He turned around and burst out in anger again. "You just wanted to know what I was doing, didn't you?", he asked sarcastically and left Bella no chance to even think of an answer but blurted on, "Well you caught me! Congratulations to you, Milady! Here I am, again, on the day of the first snow, in my old hometown, on a playground, weeping over the girl I loved but never had but in that one moment. Are you happy now?" He looked her right in the eyes, his orbs pitch black with anger and sadness. His breathing was rapid again and covered Bellatrix's face in a cold, misty cloud.

Tears suddenly welled up and her eyes grew wet. A big tear rolled down her face and she let her gaze drop. "So that was that big secret you refused to tell me about?", she asked silently but loud enough for Severus to hear. "As if you would understand", Severus snorted, turned around and stepped away. Furiously, Bella looked up, "As if I would understand?", she burst out, "ME?... No, how could I? Oh wait, yes, well maybe because my husband cheated on me with almost every pure- blooded witch in the whole wizarding community? Or maybe because he only married me for my looks and my pure- blood- status? Or, hey, I have another one: Maybe because he married me because he wanted my wealth and my family background?".

Now it was Bellatrix who was breathing heavily and who's eyes gleamed with fury and sadness. "He used me, Severus. For so many years and I refused to see it because I really loved him. I feel so stupid for it now but I did back then.", she sniffed. Severus still had his back turned on her but she merely noticed it, for Bella was caught in her own painful memories. "All these nice presents he gave me. Every year for Christmas. Something special to show off with at the annual Christmas Party at the Malfoy Manor. We went there, he showed me around and then slept with the first woman he saw. No Severus, I really think I do not have the faintest idea of what you are talking about."

After a long pause, Bellatrix sighed and looked up at Severus' back.

"An expensive piece of jewellery and a half- hearted kiss.", she said absent- minded, "every year the same... on the outside he seemed to be such a nice and loving man but reality was so far away from that." She smiled weakly. "I can't believe some women actually envied me for my marriage to him." Bellatrix let her gaze drop from Severus' back again. "You know, as a kid I simply loved Christmas. Presents and family and all but after I got married I started to hate it more and more.", she sighed and let her eyes wander about his body. "You see... I thought now that I have found you and we have settled and everything is going quite well again, or for the first time... well I just thought things could and would be different now with you and me and us and all. But maybe both our past life memories still haunt us too much to go on."

Bellatrix turned around and walked away slowly. She had sounded so very hurt that Severus almost lost it. He had been caught so tightly in his own painful memories that he hadn't even considered to think about how Bellatrix was coping with all the changes they had gone through.

That woman had always seemed so strong and determined and cruel and cold but he could now see why she had to build up that picture as well as that wall around herself. She had opened up to him very much just a moment ago and now it was Severus who had to show a bit more of a hidden side of him.

"Couldn't you just try to forget what has happened?", he asked still not facing her. She stopped in her motions and thought for a second. " Twenty years of marriage, whether they had been good or bad, is something you can't just forget.", she answered slowly.

He turned around to face her back now. "You see, you can't forget and I am afraid to.", he said thoughtfully. Bellatrix turned around to face him and gave him a puzzled look.

Severus knew she couldn't possibly understand what he meant, so he started explaining: "Many years ago, when I had been a child, my parents forgot to lock me in our house.", he pointed across the street at the house he had lived in as a child, "It was the day of the first snow and I went out to this playground because I had seen a little girl playing here. She was having so much fun and laughing so clearly that I simply couldn't resist to break my father's rules. So I went out here and joined her and spent the best afternoon of my life. She didn't make fun of me, she didn't laugh at me and she didn't hate me. Something I wasn't very familiar with. She wasn't even afraid of me after I told her that I was a wizard. Before she had to leave, I gave her a white orchid, which were, as she had told me, her favourite flowers in the world.", Severus smiled and Bellatrix also couldn't help but smile at this little tale. "Ever since she died", Severus continued and his smile died away," I come back every year to honour that little girl who grew into such an amazing woman. For a long time she was the only one I could trust and talk to. So I kept telling her every important thing that had happened in my live even after she was gone. I don't want to forget her for she gave me the only happy time I ever had."

Until then, Bellatrix had felt very sorry for Severus. But that last sentence had cut through her heart like a knife. Wasn't she making him happy then? Was he still in love with that girl or woman or whatever? She looked at him furiously.

Snape had already noticed that his last sentence sounded very much different from what he wanted to say. "Please Bellatrix. I'm not finished yet. I didn't"

"You didn't what?", she snapped," You didn't want to make me feel as used as Rudolohus always made me feel?"

"No", he said quickly, "I wanted to say that the girl gave me the best time I ever had since I started my new life with you. That was the important news this year. That I have found a woman who makes me feel just as comfortable and happy and loved as she did back then.", he added slowly.

Bella's fury and died away instantly and made room for a warm and wonderful feeling that spread though her entire body. Tears welled up in her eyes and she fell into Severus arms.

They stood there for quite some time, until Bellatrix lifted her head to look up at Severus. "I'm sorry", she said softly. He smiled and placed a sweet little kiss on top of her forehead. "Don't be", he smiled, "I'm glad I have told you. I wanted to do so earlier I just..." But Bella interrupted him with a kiss that said far more than words.

When their lips parted again, both of them smiled. "Let's go home", he said and she nodded. Hand in hand they walked a few steps. Severus turned around once more and gazed around the scenery. His last look lasted upon the orchid on the bench.

Then, the two of them disappeared in a soft _plopp._

* * *

A few days later: Christmas Eve

Bellatrix and Severus had spent the day very quiet and cosy. They had slept in long, had a nice breakfast and a hot bath together. They finished decorating the house and prepared their dinner. After eating and cleaning the kitchen, they were snuggled on the couch and just savouring a little bit of self- made egg- nogg, when Severus got up and disappeared with the words "I'll be right back". Bellatrix was puzzled.

They had both decided on not buying any presents for their time together was the best present they could think of anyway, so Bella was very surprised when Severus re-entered the living room with a small box. He smiled and handed it to her.

"I know we decided not to buy presents", he said apologetically, "but this isn't really a Christmas present... It is merely the best time to give it to you"

Severus was very excited which puzzled Bellatrix even more and she eyed the little box curiously. "Open it already", Severus said with shining eyes.

Bella opened the lid of the box carefully and her eyes grew wide in surprise. Inside the box was a small, shining ring. She looked at Severus bewildered.

With shaking hands, he slid from the couch onto one knee and said with a trembling voice and a huge smile "Bellatrix my love, do you want to marry me?"

Her soft 'Yes' almost disappeared in her happy sobs as she dropped into Severus' open arms and into a long and wonderful kiss.

...and from now on she would just love Christmas...

* * *

A little cheesy towards the end I guess but what can I say? I'm a hopeless romantic... Hope you liked it still so... I've done my part now do yours and leave me a little something... please... pretty please...?


End file.
